| ... |
[Mar. 24th, 2009|07:49 pm] |
depression is a horrifying beast that can not be slain...
...only stayed. |
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| kids are kids |
[Mar. 17th, 2009|01:04 pm] |
my 10 month old just went to her room and slammed the door in my face
WTF?! |
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| Panic |
[Mar. 5th, 2009|03:55 pm] |
I am having a panic attack.
With everything going on in MY world.
Kat is not home.
Both parents disabled.
Alex being a boy.
Steve as useless as most men.
everyone is unemployed.
the only one trying/able to go back to work is me.
But where does that leave the house? Kat? everything else?
We are rapidly running low on money.
We have to stop spending. I don't care. Steve has to get off his Ass and help. Don't care if he's sick. If I go back to work, I have to know that my daughter is going to be taken care of. Right now. I can't leave him alone with her. But he wants ME to go back to work.
Kat is NOT going into daycare. Period. End of discussion.
I am not hiring a stranger to watch her. Period.
My parents do all they can and God bless them. But they aren't physically able to do it permanently.
Okay. so yeah.
Anyone know of any jobs in the Dallas area?
Preferably in art. I am NOT working at McDonald's! |
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| bored |
[Mar. 4th, 2009|10:57 pm] |
I'm bored.
I guess that means time for bed.
I miss Kat.
She's at Oma's.
I get to get to see watchman this weekend.
yay
bored tonight though. |
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| Depression |
[Feb. 28th, 2009|07:27 pm] |
About 7 years ago I suffered a severe bout of depression. Not many people know exactly how severe and I plan on keeping it that way. However, once depression drags you that far down it is very easy to fall back into that pattern of hopelessness, especially with everything going on in world.
I just needed to send this out into the ether, Never forget the people who made a positive influence in your life. Forgive the stupid childhood indiscretions because as children we have no idea how much the things we say and do can impact a person, so many children lack empathy, because parents don't realize that it is something that needs to be taught.
Forgive teenage angst. Hormones are so insane that teenagers rarely even remember the things they say later on. If it's a high-school thing, leave it there.
If it's a life thing, find a way to be happy. Find a way to forgive yourself for being who you are.
Remember the positive. Get over you impressions of the negative. And whatever you do. Don't let issues between other people alter the way you think of them.
Your relationship. Has NOTHING to do with the outside world. |
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| Kiki |
[Feb. 24th, 2009|10:24 am] |
Okay so this post is a little story about my daughter Katherine. So if you don't wanna hear it move onto the previous post.
This is not mommy bragging this is the simple truth. My Kat began talking before most babies. She said her first words at about a month old. She said "gotta go." Now I know she probably didn't understand what she was saying at the time, but it was more than just babble too. It was a mimic. She said it right after her Grandpa said it to her. Now this is really cool and all but it's bad news for mommy and daddy. Because what mimicry at 1 month means is jabber at 9 months. Yesterday I was talking over her screaming telling her something and she screams "Mommy, don't yell at me!" and then this morning I set her down to do something and she screams at Grandpa "My mommy left me!"
Oh I am gonna get it when she finally figures out walking!
Another thing that she said this week was Daddy told her to "hush" and she replied "you"
Also her favorite word is "No" she says it about a hundred times a day.
That is all. |
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| Back to Work |
[Feb. 13th, 2009|11:55 am] |
Okay so once again a tack has been placed in the production of Xenida:memories and myths.
But it's for a better reason this time. I am finishing my professional portfolio and demo reel. Note he confidence there.
It's been about 5 years since I've had the drive to work as steadily as I have been and I want to use that drive before it fizzles out.
I had to stop working on something to begin working on the demo reel again, and I haven't heard too much interest in Xenida in a while. So even though I know it's a project worth completing, it's the only one I have right now with out a deadline. If there is any interest in this project then let me know and I can try to work it into my schedule every once in a while.
As for the deadline on my portfolio I have set it for June 2009. This means that I can re-enroll in school and hopefully have my BFA by October!
http://hajek-barbara.deviantart.com for my professional work as I finish it, along with the occasional foray into the Xenida world.
http://sintercia.deviantart.com for my stock photos as I post those online.
That's it for now. later. |
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| NEW SCANNER |
[Jan. 7th, 2009|07:01 pm] |
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It's AWeSOME! Scan up to 12800 dpi. yes that's 5 digits. Will scan negatives with NO fuss. LOVE IT. |
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| Post X-Mas Post |
[Jan. 5th, 2009|05:18 pm] |
Christmas went great. Even with the families current economic hardships we managed to pull together a great Christmas for a LOT of kids. Granny's Christmas got cancelled due to her health. But Mine was a hit. Kids that were thrilled included
Katherine- Daughter
Alex- Step-son
Nieces-
Kelsie
Alexis
Shannon
Anna
Justice
Maddy
Nefews-
Breckon
Dylan
Cody
Cayden
Austin
David
Devin
Adult family and friends that really seemed to enjoy themselves totaled at 14. My first big Christmas was a success.
Children not listed were not present but thought of foundly. We love them dearly. And missed them a great deal.
And now that that is out of the way. Looky what Kat let me do today.
Rough layout for 2009's new website!!!
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| Getting ready for Christmas! |
[Nov. 21st, 2008|01:27 pm] |
Christmas list...
Katherine- Daughter
Alex- Step-son
Nieces-
Kelsie
Alexis
Breeanna
Shannon
Anna
Savanna
Justice
Maddy
Sabrina
Sieanna
Krista
Keran
Unnamed Baby Girl due this year
Nefews-
Breckon
Aaron
Dylan
Cody
Cayden
Austin
David
Devin
Jason
Jackson
That is a lot of kids
All under the age of 13
Well David is 13 all others are under the age of 10
Krista Keran BabyGirl Jason and Jackson I MAY see for dinner at my Grandmother's house. Secret Santa for them, hopefully, will find out Sunday.
Shannon Dylan Anna Savanna Justice Sabrina Sieanna
Cousins kids that may or may not show to my house
Breeanna and Aaron I will not see this year and haven't seen in the last 4 years. My love goes out to them and they are always in my heart.
Cayden Austin Breckon Alexis
I don't know how much I'll see of these kids over Christmas
Kelsie Alexis Maddy Cody David Devin Along with my kids Kat and Alex
will most likely seem to live here over the Christmas break.
Let the Shopping Begin |
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| Life, money, living... |
[Nov. 15th, 2008|03:18 pm] |
Things to come....
Commision prices with example of work.
Estemated prices 10$ US currency PER Hand, head, foot, body, excess detail, color, etc. Size depends on complexity of piece.
Plus Shipping!!
Framing options available. prices vary. Time frame varies.
Artist retains portfolio rights.
Craft projects. prices vary, products vary. I'll explain more when I post the examples.
Trying to make a little money to help with dad's medical bills. Donations also excepted. |
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| Election |
[Nov. 6th, 2008|05:06 pm] |
OBAMA
Dear God,
I'm terrified. |
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| Hearts |
[Sep. 23rd, 2008|12:00 pm] |
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Best wishes and prayers go out to my little cousin Sabrina. A wonderously brave little 8 year old that just had open heart surgery. I'll see her again in two weeks! |
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| Activities update |
[Sep. 11th, 2008|11:15 am] |
ReWrote the story. Nessecary do to missing scripts. Trying to put it all on paper now. New names for some of the characters. Personal issues with the old names, not worth getting into. Finally found a name for the strippy shirt lady that I uploaded a while back....DeaAddormentata, Most will call her DeaAddora for short. Hopefully this means I can start working again soon.
Trying to get more help from family, I need sleep and more fre time to complete portfolio.
Did I mention that I'll probably apply to be a teacher once I graduate?
Animation requires you to move every few years, jobs are unstable. So I figured a few years teaching untill Kat is big enough to understand.
Kat is beautiful. 4 months almost over 12 pounds, just beautiful.
She is now pissed at her bouncer so internet time is over.
Mommy to the rescue. |
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| update of sorts |
[Jul. 28th, 2008|12:41 pm] |
Alrightly, my doctor gave me the postpartum clear, but I'm still having to limit activities.
Katherine turned allergic to breastmilk at 1 month. allergic to milk-based formula at 2 months. She is currently on Nutragamil or is it Nutramigal... either way it's 60-90 dollars per week to feed her.
Kit Kat (Katherine) as I've been calling her this week also enjoys Rice cereal, Oatmeal, apples, prunes, peaches, cinnamon, ginger, Pedialyte of the fruit variety... and bananas.
KitKat is also holding her head up beautifully, scooting on her tummy and back, trying to sit up, trying to stand up. She tells her Daddy jokes and me stories. (babbling and a whole lot of laughing)
She says things that sound a whole lot like the following: Gotta Go, MaMa, Dad gum Daddy, Oma, Papa, Bubba, Change me, Feed me, I don't know, no, yeah, uh-huh, nuh-uh...
Gotta Go was the first thing she said the rest just kinda followed.
Anyways she trying to get to big to fast just like all kids.
On another note. Mom and Dad are going to start babysitting so I can get back to work on my portfolio. After that's done I'm going to finnish my degree and look into maybe being a substitute for awhile. at least until Kat is in school, then who knows what will happen. |
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| BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
[Jun. 13th, 2008|06:57 pm] |
Katherine Elizabeth was born on May 14, 2008 at 4:33 pm.
Weight 6 lbs 11 oz.
20 in long
no major complications
mom and baby fine
postpardem care in progress
more activity to come.....hopefully
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| (no subject) |
[May. 6th, 2008|10:05 am] |
Kiki will be here any day now. I'm starting to dialate and she's in position.
I was trying to get back into the swing of drawing so here's a doodle.
Prego Barbie.
I was looking in the mirror last night, and do you have ANY idea how much pregnancy can change your appearance? and no I'm not talking about the ginormous belly.... |
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| Doctor said... |
[Mar. 24th, 2008|01:47 pm] |
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Weekly ultrasounds to monitor Katherines movement. Daily monitoring of sugar levels (finger pricks 6+ times a day). No Sugar, Low Carb. Still haven't heard from the nutritionist though... |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 23rd, 2008|09:15 pm] |
So I tested positive for gestational diabetes...
Doctor in the morning, nutritionist later this week probably, yeah... |
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